AVOIDING CRAIGLIST
Rumors occasionally surface from “missed connections” on Craigslist. Until last night I’d never had reason to venture onto the kooky website. Intrigued I skimmed the posts, ranging from desperate to cryptic, some ominous, several random, but then I would trip across a message – written by a person, who I envision wouldn’t normally expose their search, but their fleeting interaction with a stranger, was worth their every effort, including forfeiting pride. All on the chance that “other” person would identify this “missed connection” bulletin.
Depending on the size of your city, the number of stops you make day-to-day, your routines, your circle of friends, the odds of colliding into that person again aren’t in your favor… And while the majority of the posts were creeperish “Hey, we were at a bar and you left to go to the restroom and you never came back,” terribly pitiful. There was the rare, “Hey, I doubt you’ll find this, but if you were a tall blond at the Broncos game last night… We joked about terrible pizza in line getting beers. We waved to each other on the way out, but you were with your group of friends. I was in the blue #7 jersey. Anyway, if you happen to see this, I’d like to take you to dinner.”
A guy with genuine intentions reaching out to a girl, whose name he didn’t even know? Why couldn’t he have asked for her phone number when they were standing in line? Sounds so easy, right? But the simplicity of a guy hitting on a girl has gotten lost in the clumsiness of society. Our day-to-day interactions with the opposite sex have been hindered by this dire fear of rejection. The necessity of acceptance has been engraved in our egos –so much so, the opportunity to randomly connect in the world is determined by internet sites, worthless 2nd dates and directionless relationships. I despise the term, “pop culture” but it appears twenties-somethings have accepted that a lack of interest from someone is a product of and a fault of us as individuals. We’re “supposed” to be perfect, no rather, idealistic. How about defaulting “rejection” to the obvious: that a lack of interest is a result of a lack of chemistry, not some deformity we can remedy with more makeup or perfume?
Some people exert such effort pleasing the men or women who’ve already come and gone, they’ve lost themselves in the process… the idea of tripping across someone who without effort fits, just fits, seems implausible. When schedules are too busy to take a breath and watch the world around us, we risk missing someone standing in our blind spot, trying to catch our eye.
Thus arrives the unorthodox method of communication, Craigslist “Missed Connections” and while a worthy cause, and a fantastic story if you locate that person, it would be so much more efficient to connect on purpose, in the first place. Isn’t it annoying how a stranger with whom you exchanged few words can escape your mind for a day or two, but eventually the image of them laughing or smiling during your brief interaction continues to pop up, never straying for too long. And then what next? How often does someone make an impression, the type of impression that leaves a dent long after they’ve walked away? Few. So while Craiglist should be heralded and endorsed for all those "reconnections" and I wish those who’ve posted a missed connections the best of luck in their pursuit… It'd be nice to remind everyone that the worst thing that can happen if you ask for a phone number is the person can say no, and the best case scenario, well that's up to fate.
